Why ask Why?

I am a baker, not butcher, and I have been a candlestick maker. Yes, that is in the incorrect order, unlike the famous children's poem, but aren't most things in life these days? For instance, I went to college, had a good job, got married, then had kids, in that order. The way it should be. But now, now that I have been married for 15 years, am 35 years old, why does everything seem to be falling to pieces, even though I did it in the correct order? 

I am totes asking a rhetorical question here, as I know God has His hand in everything, but sometimes, I really would like to know why. Why, did God choose to test Job? Why did God choose Joseph to be the favorite? Why did God want Moses to part the Red Sea? Why did God choose some to see beautiful things and some to be blind? Some to be deaf? Cripple? Why? Not blaming, not being malicious. Just want to know why He chooses whom He chooses to be "ossome" and whom He chooses to be die on cross for our sins.....us....worthless and pathetic people. Just throwing this out there, as I have had wonderful things happen to me in my life (my husband, my kids, lots of material possessions that I don't need, another fabulous minivan even though I wanted a Suburban...lol) and then I have had not so great things happen to me in my life, and the latest is the greatest.

Today is the 7 year anniversary of my miscarriage. Yes, I know it sounds silly, as many have had miscarriages, and I still have four sometimes great kids that I love ohsoverymuch! But it hurts. The pain doesn't stop. I always remember. I would like others to remember, so I don't feel foolish talking about it, but they don't, so I don't. But it hurts. I will get over it, like everything else in life, because, what else am I going to do. But sometimes, just sometimes, I would like to know why.

I'll end there, as life is calling. But knowing that I don't need to know why is fine, but sometimes it would be nice to just know why.